We're all Guys
Top Gun
Home | Latest News | Mag 2003 | Mag 2002 | Top Gun | Big Shot | Battered! | Fister | Smeagol | Shakes | Ethel | Guygas | Raymond Review | Jimbo | Stubby | Eider | Mag 2002 Gallery | Mag 2003 Gallery | Fit Gallery | Seedings | Message Board

Top Shot

Top Gun

Words of Wisdom (05/12/03)
I'd like to say thanks for including me in the team, the fallen legend that I am, once a Shearer now a Heskey. I'd be lucky to tackle a fuckin fat disablist (no offence Cotton). I put my fall from grace down to a fatal night in a dingy Aylesham Council house where I suffered a career ending tackle. Since that night 9 weeks ago I have tackled 1 fatty. Bear in mind that in a pre-council house typical 9 week period I would probably tackle something in the region of 12-18 birds.

I started the season so well, hitting the net in the opening 7 post Magaluf fixtures, I was flying. I'd be happy if you only let me train with you (like Gazza at Wolves) but letting me play in the team is amazing, thanks again guys. I'm going into Saturdays match on a run of 8 goalless matches (consider this: a typical night out lasts from 8 till 2, thats 6 hours, thats 8 lots of six hours or 48 hours or 2880 minutes without a goal, pretty good for a striker i think?)

P.S. could be worse I guess, look at Shakes.......the fuckin fag.

Name: Top-Gun (also known as Pilgrim)
Age: 22
Form Guide: WWDDDWLW
Experience: Has cast the shores of Magaluf many a time and so is one with the geography of the Island. Recent ventures two months ago plus the loan spell in 2002. Will do well if teh net is cast out for the duration of the term.
Key Skills: Can speak fluent [drunken] spanish and therefore increases his skills in teh European Market. Additionally, his association with Newcastle enables the chances of a conversation with Northern Stinkers to increase by 20%. The uniform is also tried and trusted so an all round good package when facing Magaluf's trials.
Domestic experience: Spells in Southampton and Canterbury have prepared this young guy to engage with all social groups of all varying qualities.
Looks Like: Matt from One-True-Voice, Paddy Ashdown and Dawson
Favourite Interests: Football in all forms from the athletic participation in to the geeky Championship Manager. He is sure to know his Alex Mathie from his Tonton Moukoko! Also into cars, women and porn of a niche variety!
Favourite Sayings: "It's Meee"
                                "We're all Guys"
                                "Just had a muck out"
                                "Just had a beat"
                                "Guys need cock too"
                                "10 guys 20 holes, look at the possiblites"
Most Notable Acievement in Life: Achieving Z-list celebrity status with the recruitment of that bird from that student soap.
Home Strip: The Black 'D&G' (Dirty and Gay?) Number
Click Here to mail the webmaster about anything you wish to add to the profile or to get in contact with 'TopGun'.