Anyway, it was decided that, following gentlemen's tradition, a nice sit down meal would be a smooth way to finish the holidays. i was a bit gutted as I missed the Gay Cowboys that the hotel had provided the kids for entertainment but I still nonetheless made my appearance at the restaurant overlooking one of the polluted beaches of Mallorca. I, like many others, felt absolutely ruined but still proceeded to try and force some comparatively good food down my throat. It was much better than Lanzini's and it was more official than the pilot mean the night before.

 

Because I am sucha  legend I chose duck and pepper sauce and it was probably nice. The only thing was that all I could taste was either sick or the double egg baguette I made myself an hour or so before. Not really the greatest of moves but I was starving.

 

I started day seven off with a lye-in then later joining the pool side analysis of the previous night. It was good too see us mingling with the foreigners ( a couple of pikes from Essex) with whom ironically Battered and Ethel road tested the previous night. Apparently Ethel has a huge one, of Horse proportions!

 

I later krept off to check my e-mails as I am of course the most popular man apart from the big eyebrowed one from Busted and then did a bit of shopping with Fister and Smaegol. That hour around tack city literally killed me and I had to cut it short before I literally had a fit and started stabbing everyone with all the knives that were on sale in the tourist shops. *(Note Mallorca Police: Pikes + Drink + Cheap Knives = fatalities).

 

We then got ready, I wanted to wear something light as it was literally hotter than a school boiler room in summer so I had to re wear something that had already been worn. Sweat meister general I felt. Got to the restaurant, ate my food. Sam departed early to rejoin us in Pascha's. Pascha's was a nightclub that was full of Rigobert Song's relatives on the last night. There were some fitties but they were probably taken by Song, Eto and pals so we left for Lennons. Here we chilled, drank and watched battered alarmingly jump around like a right weirdo. We didn't know if he had been on beans but later found no evidence of any heinz cans in his room. Anyway, I departed with Jimbo and Top gun at that time to conduct our own mini review of magaluf. We're we too old for the island? Maybe, buit I can't wait to get absolutely hammered on the next one!

 

After incurring the worst stomach pains since I had my appendix out (I haven't actually had my appendix out but I couldn't think of a parody) I was releasing so much methane in the Airport. I was so ill and yet I knew i had to eat airport food on the plane. It was so ill. The plane journey ended and we said goodbye to the kent crew only to discover we had to train back to Reading. I had a ticket, Big Shot had a ticket, Raymod had a ticket but Battered illegally made his way undetected in the greenhouse-like train. I was so hot but well ill. I also had ill stubble-ish things on my face.

 

Got in the worst taliban taxi to Raymonds house, reviewed his accommodation, checked out whisky and Oscar (or whatever his dogs are called) and then drove back with Fister, Battered and Big Shot in the car. Fell a sleeep and sweated all the way home. The come down had arrived and illness was to beset us for the next couple of weeks. Well ill!!